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by 윤 은주 posted Sep 26, 2009
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제 아들 일기 블로그에 올려져 있는 글(Daily Journal)을 이곳에 올립니다.  
하윤이의 감사와 흥분을 함께 나누고 싶어서.....

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Korean Presbyterian Church Youth Assembly Concert.

This was an incredible day in my life, and when I think back, I am overwhelmed at what God has done in my life. I have hated piano lessons from the start. I have hated doing things (any things) that makes me sweaty. Basically, I was the book-reader type who likes dark and cool environments, with maybe a piano to play once in a while, but all the lessons, all the work, all led to this day, and maybe something later as well.

Not five months ago, I had gone on my first mission trip in my life to Chiang Rai, Thailand, where we would evangelize and help paint/renovate a church. When we came back, we all had glorious memories of God's help and of the children/teens there, living in a mountainous region which was no different than a bowl which they could not escape from. When we came back, instead of letting our daily lives pull us away from this wonderful experience, we decided to fund scholarships in Thailand to give these children a chance to have freedom to travel. The method of this funding was to have a concert.

I had been thinking about the concert ever since June of 2009, when my dad told me about the Chiang Rai mission team preparing a concert, and wanting me as a pianist. After about a month of pondering, I had agreed. After that, I started to regret it more than a bit.

I was (not but felt like I was) forced into longer piano lessons, more work, and more studies as of 8th grade. Stress was piling on top of me more and more, and soon, I was close to breaking. But I had gone too far to turn away now. I practiced all the more, and soon, I had two songs, one popular, one almost unknown. One calm and composed, one grand and chaotic. They were perfect. And of course, the first one was the hard one. It was (in my opinion) slow, boring, and hard to master because of Beethoven's style of music. (Yes, it was Beethoven's Sonata 31 op.2 for those who are interested. Don't be angry with my opinions please.) On the other hand, the grand and chaotic (more chaotic than grand, yet still a wonderful piece) music called Final Fantasy VII. JENOVA was my key to success. (For FF fans, you would know roughly what the music will sound like, unless you've actually heard the piano version. And, naturally, I assume you assume it is a grand piece.)

Then, today, the day came: Friday, the 25th of September 2009. (This is posted on the 26th because of the lateness of the hour. My eyes are drooping as I type this. ^^''') We had many meetings, practices, and scheduling, but today was d-day. (FYI "d" doesn't really stand for anything. If anything, probably "the", though "doom's" would be more quaint.) All of us rushed home from school, some straight to the concert hall (size=less than 200 people. Not that big, but still quite a lot.) All of us were a bit shaken from the shortness of the time of preparation we had, but we all did our best to be ready.

5PM. Two hours from showtime. We ran over the whole concert again, skipping many parts to shorten the time. Then, it was 7PM. People began to stream in. Now, I admit. We were amateurs. All amateurs. Maybe not Jimmy, who is a part of the Singapore Youth Symphony Orchestra, but all the rest were new to this. Now, I had done many recitals in the past, two school plays, a piano competition, a talent show, and a solo in a school concert. Never had I done a public concert before, let alone a two-in-a-row solo right before the intermission in front of two-hundred people consisting of more than 3/4 of people I don't know (but most from the church).

Using exact wording, I was thinking, right before it was my turn up, "Lord, give me strength...". then, "I'm so~ sweating. Sweaty..." It was unbearably hot backstage. The AC was all outside (oh the irony), so we were all sweaty. I, I think, was sweating the worst. "Lord, give me the peace only you can give... I need it..." Actually, I was quoting the Left Behind series, but I was desperate. Then, it was my turn.

After it was over, I was pushed out again to bow a second time. I had done it. I had done both songs without any mistakes, which I had never done before. Now, this may sound sort of cliche, but whenever I perform, and make a mistake, I get this huge sinking feeling in my heart. Some of you people reading this may know what I'm talking about. None of this happened. None needed to happen, because I didn't make any mistakes! It was unbelievable, and I was giving as much glory to God as I could.

Later, as I was walking with my dad to get the car over to where everyone was, he told me that I had made some mistakes! I told him I didn't recall hearing any mistakes whatsoever, but he said that after hearing me practice so much, he heard some mistakes that were barely noticeable. He mentioned that God may have "guided your ears". It was not that God helped me make no mistakes, but that God had kept me from acknowledging the mistakes and taking the road down the hill.

Many in our assembly had made mistakes, some barely noticeable, some almost problematic, (I shall not mention the identity of these people, as it may discredit them in a way I do not want them to), but by the grace of God, it was as perfect as we could have done.

My school theme as of this year is "Pursuing Excellence for the Glory of God." This goal was accomplished through the successful concert, and I am glad that I was able to show excellence not for myself, but for the glory of God, and to the children of Thailand, so that we may give them the opportunity for God to work his "plans I have for you, ... plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11.

All praise to God, Maker of heaven and earth.



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